Blessed Are They That Mourn

By Rick Blumenberg / @RickBlumenberg

Whatever you do, don't tell people who are bereaved and heartbroken not to mourn. I have heard such statements at the death of a saint, and although I know they were well intentioned, such admonitions are neither helpful nor wise.

In that awesome address we call the “Sermon on the Mount” Jesus told us about nine blessings from God that are amazingly helpful in the process of living well in our time world. One that is often misunderstood is when he said, "Blessed are they that mourn, for they shall be comforted."

I think he meant that mourning is God's method of sharing his comfort when we suffer loss. In the event of a great loss such as the death of a loved one the grief often comes back over and over again, especially in the time closely following. Try to realize that grief is God's way of helping us and loving us and leading us through a horribly difficult time. Accept the grief as a blessing from God and a reviver of good memories of the past.

Don’t misunderstand and think Jesus meant that the loss we suffered was the blessing. When Jesus stood at the graveside of his friend Lazarus, the Bible tells us “Jesus wept.” Jesus knew he planned to resurrect Lazarus and that it would bring glory to God, so why would he weep? Wouldn’t it be more logical that he would rejoice at what was about to happen?

Perhaps he wept for the pain Lazarus’ friends and family were experiencing. Perhaps he wept because he knew the temporariness of life and all things earthly in our time world would often bring loss, and the death of a loved one would bring excruciating loss that would stay with us for a lifetime.

We need to understand that even with the anticipation of a reunion in heaven there is still the loss of an irreplaceable earthly relationship.  Anyone who has lost a loved one knows full well this is true. Even if the death was “timely” as with a very elderly person who is ill and ready for heaven such a loss is still great and should be properly mourned. Jesus was teaching us that as we mourn such a loss, we then experience God’s loving comfort.

Part of preparing to grieve our losses is to recognize we all are temporary. Most children and youth do not believe that, but at some point in life, we are shocked to realize that someday we will all die and the world will go on without us. This can cause great pain, even agony, for some people and we often try to run from it. Humanity has always sought the “fountain of youth” and it grieves us when we finally learn it is only a fairy tale, not only for all humanity, but for each of us, personally. For a healthy view of life, we must grieve our own mortality so we can move on and enjoy the life we still have. Otherwise, we will spend those last years running from the inevitable instead of living the abundant life while we can.

God blessed us when he gave us the ability to mourn and, as a result, be comforted in our losses. Grief is one of God's healing methods for which we should be thankful and of which we should make good use of rather than reject. The person who refuses to mourn—for whatever reason—will only find grief turning inward and often doing physical and emotional damage.

Grief is not the enemy. It is God's blessing and should be embraced. Grief is the path to God’s loving comfort.

I’m Rick Blumenberg and that’s My View from Tanner Creek.

    

God's Comfort

Jesus said, “Blessed are they that mourn for they shall be comforted.”

Many times we try to spiritualize this beatitude and make it mean something spiritual in nature but I believe Jesus was dealing with a very important part of the human psyche that is often damaged by not knowing how to properly deal with loss. Grief is a normal part of life on earth. We’re in a temporary situation. People die. Things get lost. Favorite clothes wear out. Friends move away. Loss will always be a part of our lives as long as we live. None of us live forever in this life, so all of us will die and when someone dies, it is not only normal, but helpful, to grieve.

When Jesus told us to mourn, it was so we could experience comfort. He wanted us to know loss is important and should be dealt with constructively. For example, we can know a deceased loved one is with the Lord and doing well in eternal bliss, but we still miss them terribly and we need to grieve our loss in order to receive God’s comfort.

Jesus included mourning in his list of beatitudes so we could understand that grief is God’s gift to deal with the temporary nature of all things earthly. Since loss is a normal part of the human condition and it can sometimes be devastating, we need to learn how to deal with it.

Sometimes the loss will be minimal and fleeting—such as the loss of a beautiful flower that fades. You are sorry the beauty is gone and it must be discarded, but the mourning is minimal because it was expected and can be replaced by another flower or a work of art that pictures the flower.

But sometimes the losses are huge as we mentioned earlier, such as the death of a family member or friend. Or, the loss of a job we depended on for income and life purpose. In such tragic or difficult situations the pain can be excruciating and extended. If we ignore the pain or try to stuff it down somewhere into the inner parts of our psyche, the pain will not go away, it will just fester and boil until it finally breaks out in some physical or emotionally unhealthy way.

So, as Jesus said, we need to grieve our loses. The grief should be appropriate—we should not grieve to the point of being inconsolable for an insignificant loss, nor should we try to move on too quickly when the loss is considerable. But whatever the situation, be sure to grieve your losses so you can experience God’s comfort.

Notice Jesus didn’t just say “Blessed are they that mourn”. He continued with the encouraging words “for they shall be comforted.” Notice particularly that he said “be” comforted. This implies someone else is involved in the comfort and I think we can assume he meant God—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. When we grieve our losses, we experience God’s comfort. When we help someone to grieve appropriately, we work together with God in his comforting work.

At the loss of a loved one, grief is God’s way of helping you through this difficult time to victory in the days ahead, so just let him love you and share your grief. Take the time you need to find healing. Grief is God’s process to bring you complete healing, but it takes time. Time is part of the healing, so don’t rush anything so significant.

I'm Rick Blumenberg . . .and that's My View from Tanner Creek.